In Hong Kong, a city where Eastern and Western cultures meet, sex is a topic that always seems veiled in mystery — intriguing, yet something people avoid talking about. Influenced by Confucian thought and the colonial era, Hongkongers' attitude towards sex is often so conservative it is like wearing three layers of jumpers to the beach — neither comfortable nor willing to risk embarrassment. In recent years, however, with the younger generation becoming more open and sex education improving, this "jumper" is gradually being taken off. This article takes a playful perspective, combining research data, to reveal the conservative face of Hongkongers when it comes to sex, and to see how this city finds breakthroughs amid taboos.


How Conservative Are Hongkongers? The Numbers Speak
When it comes to Hongkongers' conservatism about sex, the data is unforgiving. According to the Family Planning Association of Hong Kong's 2011 "Youth Sex Study", 63.8% of unmarried young people were open to premarital sex, but over 76% held negative views of multiple sexual partners, and 83% opposed "compensated dating" and similar behaviour, showing that Hong Kong young people still hold traditional bottom lines when it comes to certain sexual behaviour. Another global survey from 2008 found that 62% of Hong Kong young people felt "embarrassed" buying condoms — the highest among the 10 countries surveyed, far above the US and European average of 25%. This means that many Hongkongers would rather take risks than "lose face" at the pharmacy counter.


Moving to more recent years, interestingly, a 2022 sex and wellness survey by Lelo found that 81% of Hong Kong respondents had never used a sex toy, over half said they had absolutely no interest in trying one, and 38% even said outright that sex toys were "perverted". This contrasts sharply with Western countries — for example, among young Americans, by the age of just 21, 31.1% of women and 45% of men had already had six or more sexual partners, far higher than the figures in Hong Kong. These numbers paint a picture: when Hongkongers talk about sex, it is as if they are in a contest of "whoever blushes first loses".


The Cultural Roots of Conservatism
Why are Hongkongers so "shy" about sex? It starts with the cultural roots. Confucian thought emphasises "do not look at what is improper", and sex is seen as a topic too private to mention in public — conversations about sex education between parents and children are even rarer. Sex education in schools is also stuck on the 1997 guidelines, focusing mostly on "scare tactic" education about pregnancy and sexually transmitted diseases, with little discussion of emotions and consent. The influence of Christianity has also deepened the conservative atmosphere, with some church schools even avoiding talk of sexual pleasure, as if talking about sex were tantamount to encouraging "promiscuity".
This conservative mindset is also reflected in everyday life. Hong Kong's high rents and living culture mean many couples still live with family after marriage, and 84% of respondents said cramped space directly affects their sex life, while nearly 40% of young couples have to rely on hotels for a "sneaky rendezvous". Just imagine — "doing it" next door to your parents' room, who would not feel as if they were on a secret mission?


Fun Sparks That Break the Taboo
Despite the conservatism, as time goes by, Hong Kong's sex talk is quietly being "unlocked". For example, sexual health workshops run in recent years by the local sex education organisations "性本善" (Sex Is Inherently Good) and The Family Planning Association of Hong Kong have attracted more and more curious young people, covering everything from safe sex to gender diversity — a wide range of topics.


When I founded FunGarden at the end of 2019, I too struggled to find a shop because of the prejudice that "a sex toy shop is not respectable", but during the pandemic in 2020, sales of "entry-level" products such as lubricants and massage oils surged, showing that Hongkongers were quietly exploring new ways to play. Even more interestingly, in 2021 the upmarket department store On Pedder held a female sexual pleasure pop-up store, openly displaying sex toys, as if to say: "Sex toys can be fashionable too!"
Progress on LGBTQ+ issues has also brought new energy to sex talk. A 2023 survey showed that 60% of Hongkongers supported same-sex marriage, a sharp rise from 38% in 2013. The annual Pride parade and ViuTV's same-sex drama "We Are the Littles" (《男排女將》) have brought gender diversity into the mainstream, proving that Hongkongers are moving from "changing colour at the mention of sex" to "not afraid to talk about sex". 
 

The Future: From Embarrassment to Confidence
Although Hong Kong's taboo around sex has not completely disappeared, the pace of progress cannot be ignored. To make sex talk more open, schools need to update sex education curricula to cover emotions and consent; the media can report more stories about sexual health to reduce stigma; and individuals can start small — for example, sharing an article about sexual knowledge with a friend, or plucking up the courage to buy a condom. And do not forget — blushing is a lovely beginning too!